How the LA19SCBWI Conference Complimented My Mentorship

“Allow yourself to listen to the still, small voice that is bidding you to do.”  (Alice Faye Duncan, LA19SCBWI)

Introduction:  FOCUS

One of the main goals that Adam and I set for our #PBChat mentorship was to get more me into my manuscripts.  In order for that to happen, I need to flush out all the negative self-talk and other things getting in the way of hearing my “still, small voice.” 

The mentorship officially started this month.  I had paid for the LA19SCBWI Conference before I knew about #PBChat.  At first, I was worried that attending the conference would distract me from focusing on my mentorship.  Rather, this conference leaves me refreshed, energized, and better equipped to tackle it.  In this blog, I will share how the LA19SCBWI helped me get out of myself (the introversion, the doubts, the fear, etc.) and into my #PBChat mentorship.           

YOGA and a “Coincidence”

I enjoyed the yoga on Saturday morning.  Being a beginner, I found Lori’s instruction to be both easy to follow and appropriately challenging.  While I physically stretched myself, I similarly expanded my mind and prepared myself for being open to all that the LA19SCBWI Conference had to offer. 

At the conclusion of the class, Lori scattered about 100 cards – pictures on the front; words on the back – on the carpet and invited us to select an image that spoke to us.  I picked the “eye,” which was actually the Sea Serpent.  My card said: “The Sea Serpent represents …expression…. creativity… helps us move…into a healthy current…. We express ourselves creatively …without fear or shame…. We loosen the grip of self-judgement…. We let the cool waters of forgiveness in to heal our wounds.”  Was it an interesting coincidence that I was reading about creativity at a writing conference?  I’m not sure I believe in coincidences!

Mandatory Morning Pages 

I made it a point to continue doing my morning pages, an exercise from Julia Cameron’s THE ARTIST’S WAY, throughout the conference.  I spent about ten minutes (or three pages) writing in my journal freestyle first thing every morning.  I wrote whatever I wanted – journal stuff, conference information, gossip, meaningless words, budget stuff – everything!  This helped me empty my brain so that I could fill it up with what the day had to offer:  lessons, insight, and meeting new people. 

Did all this “extra” writing do anything?  Yes!  Lots!  I have attended scores of conferences over the past decade.  At all of them, I noticed common themes with my behavior, all revolving around introversion.  I was always on the periphery of the conference.  But this conference was different.  I talked to anybody.  I felt only a little jet lagged.  I was just a little “whelmed;” not overwhelmed.  At the “Woodstock, 50 Years Later” party, I danced right up in front of the stage.  I credit all of these things to the morning pages exercise, although I don’t understand the “why” yet.  I wonder how these changes will ripple through the rest of my life!

Learning

To say I learned a lot at this conference would be an understatement.  I have so many bullet points, practices, and mindsets to bring with me into my mentorship as a result of those four intensive days of conferencing.  On Friday, I learned more about rhyme and rhythm in picture books, with #PBChat mentor, Lori Degman. I LOVED Linda Sue Park’s writing room on Saturday afternoon.  Writing anything, I believe, helps a writer get better at writing what she wants to write. My take-home from Sunday, after listening to Carol Hinz’s lecture, was that I need to rewrite the back matter for three of my stories.  On Monday, I learned that a couple of agents whom I had previously thought desirable, while they are still very talented and knowledgeable, might not be the right fit for me.

Deepening Relationships… and Food

One of the best things to happen during this conference was the down-time spent with my critique buddies.  In particular, I am grateful for the time they spent helping me to revise one of my upcoming potential magazine publications.  But I also enjoyed things such as re-trying sushi for the first time in nearly a decade.  I liked it!

I met Stacey Mozer at the NESCBWI luncheon and ate nearly an entire gluten free pizza on my own!  Speaking of food, it was feast or famine throughout the weekend.  They fed us once on Friday, once on Saturday, once on Sunday, and not at all on Monday. Although we went out to eat three times, seven of our meals came from a Thursday evening Target run.  The best meal was the taco bar at the “Woodstock, 50 Years Later” party on Saturday night.

Bonus!           

During lunch on Saturday, I attended an illustrators’ informal workshop, munching on veggies and hummus and sketching the live models in 5- and 10-minute drawing sprints.  When I went up to the woman model, Ariel, at the end (to show her my favorite pose and talk about modeling and sketching), a camera crew swooped down upon us.  I might be included in a documentary film!

Conclusion    

All in all, I am very glad I attended the LA19SCBWI Conference.  It directly supported my mentorship; in fact, it seems like a huge “coincidence” that the conference took place at the beginning of my mentorship.  I feel primed for writing, thinking, and revising throughout the months ahead. 

“If you are comfortable with your uncertainty, then you are on the path of learning.”  (Yuyi Morales, LA19SCBWI)

Did you go to LA19SCBWI?  What were your big take-home messages from the conference?  What other writing workshops would you recommend attending?

SO MUCH MORE THAN A WIN

I cannot remember the last time I was this happy!  I have no words!  And I’m going to need words… I just won a #PBChat mentorship with the fabulous Adam Wallace! 

!!!!!!

I’m going to document my mentorship over a series of blogs.  And this first blog is going to be two-part:  BEFORE my first conversation with Adam, and AFTER.

BEFORE:

I had to work a double shift the day the mentees were announced.  Would I turn my phone off and check it in the evening?  Would I check it at the sound of each ping?  When would Justin announce each mentorship?  Why did I feel like an imposter?  These were the questions going through my mind Tuesday evening (okay, maybe for the entire month of July!)

Let’s backtrack even more… I had hit a point in my writing career where I had nearly stopped querying.  I felt like every manuscript was more trash than gem, and I struggled to find the time needed to revise all 17 manuscripts.  I also felt guilty for the time I spent writing, which was always time NOT spent with my family.

Enter #PBChat.  I latched onto #PBChat and sunk my teeth into it; hungrily devouring the Twitter feed each Thursday morning (I had to work late Wednesdays, when #PBChat took place).  I became addicted.  I became obsessed. 

Obsessed you say?  Yes, I became hooked on the idea that winning a #PBChat mentorship would be my nod that I was going in the right direction.  If I won, then I’d know all this time writing and therefore all this time away from my kids would be worth it.  God or whatever you believe in would be confirming that I am indeed allow to pursue my dream of being a children’s picture book writer.

Okaaaaaay.  I know I was being irrational.  But I also know me.  And one of my weaknesses is that once I get something stuck in my head, it’s really hard for me to get it out!

At 10:10 am on July 31st, my phone beeped.  I was supposed to be taking a patient history for one of the sisters at a nursing home for nuns. 

I glanced briefly at my phone, just looking for the shape of the cards that Justin’s #PBChat announcements came on.  I would check my messages later (otherwise, I knew I wouldn’t be able to give my patients the attention they deserved!)

But my brain, in that split-second glance, recognized my name!  WHAT?  I grabbed my phone with two hands, ignoring whatever the sister was saying to me (probably in French).  OH. MY. GOSH.  I was the first mentee ever for #PBCHat, and I had won my first choice, Adam Wallace! 

I can honestly say my happiness was disproportional… I was happier beyond belief.  And I still am.  It’s the longest running happy high I have ever had in my life! 

I let it all hang out in my application to Adam Wallace.  I said what came to mind, uncensored.  I felt like I was cheating when I wrote that application.  I had FUN with it.  It was 100% me. 

So to have someone select me being 100% me – if that makes any sense – is mind-blowing and life-altering for me. I’m going to allow myself to be me for this entire mentorship.  I wonder, will I explode?

Okay, I’ve got to go make dinner.  I get to meet Adam in less than two hours!!!!

AFTER:

I’m back! 

It’s definitely meant to be!  Adam said our first goal was to get the “me” in the application into my manuscripts.  Haha!  I can’t wait! 

Been on any first dates lately?   What about first dates where you know you’ll be seeing a lot of the other person for the next few months, regardless of whether or not he’s just as okay in person as he is on paper?  I felt a little like that… except for the dating part.  Haha!

You know what?  We clicked!  Hooray! 

The result?  I am even more excited – if that’s even possible – for this mentorship.  Woo-hoo!  Let’s get started!

Speaking of started, I’ll be checking out the book The Artist’s Way, as well as spending 10 minutes each morning freewriting whatever comes into my head, uncensored. 

Oh, and I sent over a bunch of my manuscripts.  You know that feeling of vulnerability that comes with sharing your work, your baby (even if your baby is a little underdeveloped, haha) in a query or critique group?  Well, magnify that by something-fold:  sharing a lot of works all at once is QUITE. A. FEELING.

I’ll keep you posted over the next several days and months ahead.  I won’t promise stellar blog writing, but I do promise to share.

How about you?  What are you working on?  Any pre-writing tips you’d like to share?  Any big or small news or plans?